My Weekend NOT in Minnesota

Dealing with a toxic person is one thing but dealing with a toxic mother is another. She is my mom and I love her but I DON’T have to like her. It’s worse now that I’ve recently learned that my father tried contacting me before he died and she lied to him. Told him she doesn’t know where I am or how to get a hold of me. Yeah, can’t get right with that. Not now and not anytime soon. This is how it started…

Friday morning (early-during my writing and creative time) my mother messaged me on FB. We have that relationship now (which I prefer) to communicate through messaging. She asked if I wanted to go to Minnesota with her for the weekend like a road trip. This warranted a phone call which she proceeded to tell me that the boyfriend was in the hospital and was going to have his foot amputated. REMIND YOU she was calm and would like me to go along to help drive and company. No. Just no. What would happen is a huge argument and jealousy. It also helped that I had plans and the kids had plans and I didn’t have the vacation time. Surprisingly, she didn’t fight me on it.

Now, I’ve made it as far as my clinicals in nursing and understand more than she obviously realized. For an entire weekend, I heard about second surgeries, kidney failure and a total of 3 infections. Trying to decipher what’s true and what SHE wants to be true was a chore and I’m not a subtle person when it comes to BS. She was even crying about having to temporarily move to the state while he’s recovering! Are y’alls eye twitching yet? This back and forth of surgeries, infections, and her not getting any sleep was stressful and I put my phone away.

I was at a local soup social that supported a pagan group when I was being my ‘awkward believing no one liked me-self,’ when I decided to look at my phone. MISTAKE! I had gotten a message from my mom telling me that he was miraculously recovering and will be making a transfer back here to our state. EYE roll please…a message this morning, he took another turn for the worse all the infections are back and he needs dialysis. We already knew he needed that.

Long story short, I’m glad I didn’t go. I’m sorry for her boyfriend having an amputation but he stopped taking his meds and caring for the wound per doctor’s instructions. I hope they are able to save his life in the end but this is something I choose to step away from because it’s healthier for me and my family. I firmly believe my mom has MSBP.

Soup at the soup social was great by the way.

Monday…Already?

I only failed at one goal I had set this weekend. I beat myself up for only a bit when I realized that it’s ok. I wanted to create another video on Saturday…Sassy Saturday, trying to quickly recap the week but that didn’t happen. Those adults that actually use the weekend to relax are effing UNICORNS! Or I’m doing life all wrong. I think it’s because I waste 40 hours a week at a job. Oh, and the kids! Too good to walk ANYWHERE and always needing rides. Or the fact that NO ONE in the house can put a meal together to save their lives. This feels more like a rant…moving on. Saturday…I did adult things like errands. Oh, I also set up a payment arrangement for default student loans that I can’t afford and cried into the AWESOME ooey gooey triple chocolate brownies. If that’s not adulting at its finest I don’t know what is.

I wanted to do something to relax, a way to zone out my adult problems so I tried my hand at something new…woodburning. I saw these CUTE little Norse Yule ornaments but I couldn’t afford the prices because I wanted ALL of them. It also felt personal for me to make these. What I learned…don’t use cheap wood discs that are prepackaged at the local big box store. And that with that revelation…I needed more wooden discs! Y’all, this was so relaxing and I was so EXCITED to see that it didn’t turn out to be a HUGE fail.

I was also able to squeeze in a kindred’s book club meeting yesterday and happy that the next book is actually a free one. Perfect for my holiday budget 😁. I have some reading to do, wood to find, and a Yule Goat to make. The goat will be for another post. I’m sure after watching how-to videos it’s going to be a mess. Happy Monday everyone!

February 12th, 2018

What a weekend! Stress, fun, food, tears, and laughter all crammed into two days. Let’s start with Friday. My husband and I were still arguing and we finally talked and he understood where I was coming from and we reached an understanding and compromise that we can both live with. Then came the overage texts and after looking it was my youngest daughter. Nipped that one in the butt right there. Then my husband and I had a dinner at a local Irish pub (it wasn’t authentic but close enough from what I grew up eating) and we did something that we hadn’t done in a long time…talk.

Saturday,  breakfast with the family, shoe shopping with my oldest daughter to get her ready for her semi-formal and from there I went grocery shopping. My husband makes chicken biscuits and fries for dinner (all frozen of course…bless his bones).

Sunday, I woke at 4 am and started my Southern-Irish grandmother’s recipe for lamb stew and then breakfast with the hubby. We wanted to try somewhere new and landed in a downtown of a busy town. I had my usual staple but HE HAD to try the breakfast challenge. Even though he didn’t finish I’m proud of him for trying (it was a bucket list item that he got to check off). I can’t remember when I had so much fun with him. Laundry and dinner rounded out the night.

NOW, in between all of the errands and fun I had to call in a complaint to Verizon about a local satellite store authorizing and placing an order for a phone that I didn’t ask for. An hour later a solution was decided…not mine but one that I could agree too. My anxiety was through the roof simply because I had felt violated. Someone else made this decision for me and accessed private information. I wanted his head on a stick and his arms and legs mounted at the four corners of the town to serve as a warning to other cellular dealers not to do what he had done. I know that’s dramatic but that’s where I go with my anxiety and sense of justice.

I also wrote a short story which I will edit and post later. I also will start a couple of small watercolor projects. BUT what’s awesome I started another book on my list. I took a couple of days off from reading but already on chapter 5 of Jane Eyre by Charlotte BrontĂ«. I’m thinking I bit off more than I can chew…it is a LONG book but here goes nothing. I will update my reading journal tonight.

So yes, busy, fun, stressful, weekend but I didn’t lose sight of my writing, reading, and some art goals. Please, if you have goals try something small towards achieving the bigger picture.

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