Saturday Stints

Saturday is my day to get all the errands completed even when the budget gets tighter than what was expected. Groceries are first and then my photo for the day which I’ll be trying to capture in a town over since that’s where I pick up groceries. Then it’s trying to poorly draw my comic for the week. If it brings a giggle then so be it.

Then it’s Thor’s Blot tonight with the kindred and I’m just trying to hammer out some details that were not mentioned on the event page. This means possibly putting a dish together at last minute with as little funds as possible.

Now, in a panicked fast voice read on: I need to pick up groceries but leave enough money left over to possibly make a dish to pass at the blot tonight, then I need to get a photo for my 365 Day project because I CANNOT flake out on that if I want to get better at cell phone photos. Oh, I need to edit them and post too. I can do that from my phone if I have to but I hate it. What is my comic going to be about this week? Ugh, fuck it. I’ll wing it. Oh, I need to look for one of my wacoms and PRAY that there is still software somewhere for me to download. I got on the treadmill this morning but I better make sure and eat low points today because if there is food at the blot I would want to eat. Damn the mead, I’m going to have to dip in my weekly points. Not a problem I have almost a full bank. Shit, I need to put money in the kids’ lunch account, and gas. Gas needs to go in the car. It’s almost 6 in the morning I if I look now I can find the tablet and doodle in peace before the kids get up. Too late, I heard legos being dumped in the floor upstairs. Leftovers, the kids can have leftovers tonight and the younger one goes with us.

This is almost exactly what it’s like with my anxiety but what people are not seeing is the depression because all I want to do is crawl back into bed and forget what all needs to be done and went through my head. I know I have forgotten something and will remember it when it’s past time to be done or due. Off to look for one of my archaic Wacom tablets. Happy Saturday everyone!

Monday…Already?

I only failed at one goal I had set this weekend. I beat myself up for only a bit when I realized that it’s ok. I wanted to create another video on Saturday…Sassy Saturday, trying to quickly recap the week but that didn’t happen. Those adults that actually use the weekend to relax are effing UNICORNS! Or I’m doing life all wrong. I think it’s because I waste 40 hours a week at a job. Oh, and the kids! Too good to walk ANYWHERE and always needing rides. Or the fact that NO ONE in the house can put a meal together to save their lives. This feels more like a rant…moving on. Saturday…I did adult things like errands. Oh, I also set up a payment arrangement for default student loans that I can’t afford and cried into the AWESOME ooey gooey triple chocolate brownies. If that’s not adulting at its finest I don’t know what is.

I wanted to do something to relax, a way to zone out my adult problems so I tried my hand at something new…woodburning. I saw these CUTE little Norse Yule ornaments but I couldn’t afford the prices because I wanted ALL of them. It also felt personal for me to make these. What I learned…don’t use cheap wood discs that are prepackaged at the local big box store. And that with that revelation…I needed more wooden discs! Y’all, this was so relaxing and I was so EXCITED to see that it didn’t turn out to be a HUGE fail.

I was also able to squeeze in a kindred’s book club meeting yesterday and happy that the next book is actually a free one. Perfect for my holiday budget ūüėĀ. I have some reading to do, wood to find, and a Yule Goat to make. The goat will be for another post. I’m sure after watching how-to videos it’s going to be a mess. Happy Monday everyone!

February 17th, 2018

I have a few stolen moments between caring for a sick husband, running the house, cooking the specific dinner requested by the contagious man baby, errands, and keeping the kids alive to post about my day.

I have my petri dish of infectious husband quarantined in our room which meant that I’m not inhaling the diseased air as I sleep in the living room. In doing so my son was up at 4 am thinking that it was a weekday. I was able to get him to wait for breakfast until 6 am that consisted of scrambled eggs, bacon, and skillet taters (something I thought that would be easy on the hubby’s tummy). From there I monitored the weather and had some errands to run in a larger city an hour away. My oldest daughter and I timed the trip perfectly and were able to retrieve the purchases and then go to the grocery store all before the snow hit. BONUS: I remembered the salt for the sidewalks.

The only ‘slap in the face’ part of my day was a simple question¬†that I asked an individual at the mall. Now it’s very difficult for me to go into crowded areas and need to take my medication for even stepping out of the car but this errand was important to my daughter so we had to go. While in the mall I saw¬†service dogs that were going through training. No, I didn’t touch or even ask to touch the animal. I simply asked where and how do¬†I go about getting a service dog for me. She looked at me as if there was no reason for me to even be asking her this question. I disclosed that I have C-PTSD and could benefit a great deal from a service dog or even an emotional support animal. She said a note from the doctor and $5000. I need to prove that I was abused for years? Can barely live with myself, have night terrors, flashbacks, panic attacks, and have days that I can’t get out of the bed just to name a bit of what I experience in a week. They train for veterans and no further help or advice. I was at a loss for words. I can barely afford decent¬†watercolors let alone that training. Devastated I went home. I shoved it to the back of my mind and have come to accept that I will never be able to have a service dog. I’m sorry I’m not a deserving individual for such a necessity.

One of the items on my list was the movie, ‘Stand By Me’. My daughter heard her friends talking about it and how the kids in the movie find a body. I Scoffed louder than I should have and explained that the movie was more than kids finding a body. So, when we got home we put away the groceries and I started right away cooking lunch. Chicken noodle soup and grilled cheese for my patient and tomato soup and grilled cheese for the rest of us. We sat down to feast on our lunch minus the infected and by the end of the movie my daughter was crying. I just looked at her and simply asked, ‘Do you understand now?’ Red-faced¬†she nodded.

I have dinner in the oven now and Rocky is on the TV, another movie that her friend told her that she needed to see. I now have a running list of movies for these kids to watch. I’ll do my 6-word story after dinner with my time being rather occupied today and hopefully able to start a couple of projects that I have jotted down as I thought about them. Wish me luck that I’m able to do so.

Important Side Note:
Thank you to everyone that is reading and following my blog. It doesn’t go unnoticed and helps me more than you could think. It also gives me the encouragement I need to comment, follow blogs, and write on my own and I love immersing myself in the inspiration that other authors offer on their blogs. Thanks ya’ll.

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