I was sitting at work on Friday dreading the weekend. It’s not because of having nothing to do or being bored. It’s because I have an obligation to my daughter to take her shopping for her semi-formal dress and it’s coming up fast…next weekend fast. My second job is prohibiting a lot including dress shopping with my daughter, doing her hair and makeup, time with my kids and husband, my writing, and a side project I started but cannot find the time to work on.
I picked up what I had decided my last check that afternoon. I prepared a speech as to why I’m quitting with no notice and before I could say anything my manager told me that there was another party and I would not have help. This has happened more than once and when I do have another bartender on duty with me she is incompetent. So I’m left with doing the work of two bartenders plus running up and down the stairs carrying two cases of beer at a time or to change a keg because my other bartender doesn’t want too. I left angry.
I woke up yesterday morning to my daughter asking when I’m taking her dress shopping and what the budget would be. I already had groceries shopping to do and I promised my son that he could go and get the toy he earned for doing his share of the chores. But with everything that I had to do yesterday, my daughter would feel rushed trying to find her perfect dress for a magical night and to have my son grab any old toy not teaching him the value of money and the decisions he makes. I already had to run to my day job for a couple of hours to work on some software so I had to also factor in that time as well. So, I texted my manager (because that is the only way he contacts me) and quit. 6 messages later he got the hint.
The rest of the day I had mild panic attacks. This was something new, something I have been doing for years, a third income that I provided to my family and the unknown. I was able to be distracted by the fun I was having with my kids and the time we spent together. Also something I haven’t been able to do in 3 years.
So, here I am enjoying my coffee and enjoying writing. I’m waiting for February’s writing prompts to come out and for the kids to wake up so I can make breakfast. I keep reminding myself that it’s going to be fine, we are going to be fine. My time is worth more than $60 a day and my body is getting too old to do that kind of work anymore.